Today was Angelina’s quarterly endo appointment. I don’t know why but I always feel over-prepared for her visits. It’s almost as if I’m expecting her endo to suddenly tell us we’re doing everything wrong and change everything. However, every visit I am reminded why we love her. Because she doesn’t.
We were at the office for about an hour. In that time the nurse checked Ang’s blood sugar (238 -high from waffles), her a1c (6.7!!!) and took her pump and meter to download. We did wait a little while for the endo to come in, but she always gives us her full attention and never makes us feel rushed. She always has complimentary things to say and this is the second visit in a row where she pretty much said that we’re doing great and things look great and she doesn’t change a thing. We discussed morning breakfast spike and how I feel that is probably why Angelina’s a1c went up slightly from her last visit in August when it was a 6.5 (lowest ever!).
Because now that she’s back in school and morning’s can be hectic we don’t always get the chance to pre-bolus. And breakfast is pretty much convenience foods that are quick and she can eat on her walk to school, which coincidentally are some of the foods that seem to cause the biggest spikes. Her endo asked if I thought we should look at her breakfast ratio and I said that I had played with it a bit, but then we dealt with lows instead and that it was usually high on mornings when I know we didn’t do all we could to prevent that spike. She turned to me and said “You’re the expert.”
Maybe I’m being narcissistic, but I always love it when the endo tells me I’m the expert. Because, well, I am. I’m not a diabetes expert. I don’t have a medical degree and I probably can’t do or know even half of the endocrinology related things that her endo does, but I am an expert in MY kid and MY kid’s diabetes. The fact that her endo not only recognizes, but also verbalizes that, makes me feel awesome. And because she trusts my judgment, it makes me trust my judgment, and that means that I am more proactive in caring for Angelina’s diabetes and making changes when needed, instead of sitting around wringing my hands wondering what I should do. Or worse- waiting by the phone for the doctor to call to tell me what to do. Don’t get me wrong – there’s nothing wrong with either of those options and if your dr hasn’t given you the instruction or guidance needed to make those types of decisions on your own or you don’t feel comfortable making them, then it’s better and safer not to. There is no right or wrong way. But I have never been one to sit around and wait for someone else to tell me how to handle things that I am capable and willing to handle on my own with occasional guidance.
These appointments provide me with that guidance. They provide me with that feedback that it’s okay to do things my way, and the way I am doing things is having a positive outcome. And knowing that if I don’t know or I’m not comfortable that the endo is there to help, but ultimately this is Angelina’s disease (and mine since I’m handling daily management) and not the doctor’s.
Afterwards Angelina wanted Taco Bell and consumed 146 carbs at 3:45 in the afternoon for a “snack”.